Update on renovations to Pace Manor

The Michaelmas term of this academic year will see some major renovations to the Pace Manor in college. This has the knock-on effect of moving 40 Hatfield freshers into the Shoichi building by St Mary’s College until February of next year. The Shoichi building does have a roof but it is in no way comparable to the standards in our own college – their bathrooms, apparently, do not even have After Eight mints lying around. Thus, to decide which students move over there as construction continues, students are asked to submit a detailed family tree. Those who are farthest down the royal line of succession will be moved to Mary’s. They will be able to receive breakfast from that college and lunch and supper at Hatfield. It should be noted that St Mary’s College apparently has no quails eggs, caviar, or Lansom. We apologize profusely for the inconvenience of having to confront the outside world.